Fri. Jul 1st, 2022

That’s the best thing about tonight’s that we are not fighting. I don’t have to watch you flirt with the good looking guy who has probably just been dumped by his girlfriend. He’s nice, he smells good and he has floppy hair which is my favorite type of hair–plus, he doesn’t have a tattoo so it seems like your chance is pretty high. Your turn next.
“the best thing about tonight’s that we are not fighting” : “the fact that we’re not fighting, I mean.”
Title: [ARTICLE CONTINUED]
The best thing about tonight’s is that we are not fighting. I don’t have to watch you flirt with the good looking guy who has probably just been dumped by his girlfriend. He’s nice, he smells good and he has floppy hair which is my favorite type of hair–plus, he doesn’t have a tattoo so it seems like your chance is pretty high. Your turn next.
“The best thing about tonight’s is that we are not fighting.”
Title: Another great example from the article 2: [ARTICLE CONTINUED]
“That’s the best thing about tonight’s that we are not fighting. I don’t have to watch you flirt with the good looking guy who has probably just been dumped by his girlfriend. He’s nice, he smells good and he has floppy hair which is my favorite type of hair–plus, he doesn’t have a tattoo so it seems like your chance is pretty high.”
Title: [ARTICLE CONTINUED] + [NEW]

the best thing about tonight's that we re not fighting
the best thing about tonight’s that we re not fighting

A discussion on why fighting is a bad idea in relationships and why it’s important to cut the cord and focus on what you have instead of what you don’t.

It’s so hard to explain this in a way that’s easy to understand, but I’ve been practicing how I’m going to say it and I hope you’re feeling the same way. Fighting is the #1 major issue that plagues relationships in our generation today and it’s something that some people actually want in their relationship. It doesn’t mean you don’t fight or can’t fight–it means that you are fighting with each other instead of fighting WITH each other. We are fighting with each other–not for each other. Unfortunately it’s not until you fight enough that you realize how much you actually don’t like each other and then it’s too late. Fighting robs couples of what they really have to work on, instead of working on what they actually have. You see, if there is one thing that most people in relationships struggle with, it’s communication and that means fighting every day is not the answer. If any of you have ever gotten sucked into a fight with your partner, chances are you’ve talked it out later. You still don’t like each other, but at least you know you didn’t like it as much as you thought. I’m not saying that fights don’t exist in healthy relationships, just that we are bad at fighting with each other–fighting with each other and doing what we need to do to make it stop. But as you know, I only teach what I believe in. I’ve found that most people don’t want to stop fighting–they want to do it “my way”.
And on a final note, one of our leaders at the church has become overwhelmed with issues in her life and is feeling a lot of pain and confusion. She feels like she needs to separate from the church for some time. We have told her not to do this until we can talk about it and pray about it, but she won’t listen. This is not what I want at all, but like I told her, we feel that this is the best way for her to heal. Please keep her in your prayers and love and thoughts–the leaders especially. Thank you!
PRACTICAL PRAYER:

the best thing about tonight's that we re not fighting
the best thing about tonight’s that we re not fighting

That’s the best thing about tonight’s that we not fighting. I don’t have to watch you flirt with the good looking guy who has probably just been dumped by his girlfriend. He’s nice, he smells good and he has floppy hair which is my favorite type of hair–plus, he doesn’t have a tattoo so it seems like your chance is pretty high. You can get in this guy’s pants and he won’t even know it, right?
You see the angle here? I don’t have the energy to fight tonight. My eyes hurt from all of your insults. Rude to the pool guy because he told you to put a cover on top of your swim suit. Someone should have told you that pool covers are for when it’s cold out, not when it’s humid out. I could just not say anything and hold my breath when the pool guy comes over.

the best thing about tonight's that we re not fighting
the best thing about tonight’s that we re not fighting

In our busy world, we often forget that there are many benefits to avoiding conflict. In fact, many studies have shown that when there is a lack of conflict in a relationship, it often leads to more positive interactions between partners. It’s also good for the health of your relationship overall because you’ll avoid arguments and potentially destructive disagreements. You might also find yourself feeling happier and healthier as well!

I can’t think of anything more annoying than arguing with someone all day. We don’t want to fight, so why do we do it? I know for me, I tend to get defensive and want to fight when I feel like the other person is criticizing me. But who’s really being criticized? Are you criticizing your partner or are you just frustrated? I think most of the time people are frustrated but they don’t want to sound like a baby or a sissy so they make the other person feel like they are attacking them–but who’s really being attacked? Sometimes a heated argument can seem like an excuse for not communicating effectively or not being able to express your feelings, but I think it really comes down to avoiding the conflict.
When you’re in a long term relationship there are bound to be disagreements and hard times. But how do you deal with these problems without arguing? How do you communicate your feelings without getting upset and resentful? I don’t have any magic answers, but I think it’s important that we all try to work on them. So I’ve come up with a few things that I’m going to try to remember to do. And maybe you will too?
Remember There’s No Right Way To Do This

the best thing about tonight's that we re not fighting
the best thing about tonight’s that we re not fighting

Just like you’re not going to be able to fight every day, you’re also not going to be happy every day. But what’s important is that you learn how to talk about the things that bother you and when you realize that fighting for the same reasons every day isn’t going to work, then you have a better chance of improving your relationship. You’re obviously not going to be fighting every day, but if you can get a handle on when you’re going to fight, then you’ll have a better chance of avoiding it altogether.
Title:
Author: Grace R. Williams, Ph.D.
Title: The New York Times [free online, but registration is required]
Author: Alan G. Heyer, Ph.D.
Title: Time Magazine [free online, but registration is required]
Author: Robert Bly

the best thing about tonight's that we re not fighting
the best thing about tonight’s that we re not fighting